Week 49: Almond Roca Cookies

This week I chose to bake almond roca cookies.  I wanted something chocolatey, and I've had this recipe in my arsenal for some time, so I decided to try it out.  Last week's cookies were not a huge hit.  Sure they were okay, but definitely a departure from the type of cookies I usually bake.  To atone, I made numerous batches of pear bread (as I still had a bunch of pears left over) and it was delicious!  Since I was a little "peared out", I decided to shift gears and go in a different direction completely.  These cookies alphabetically were at the top of my list, and I had all the ingredients so I selected it for the cookie of the week.  Actually, I didn't have all the ingredients...the ingredient list called for an 8 ounce chocolate bar.  Since I didn't have a chocolate bar on hand, I used chocolate chips instead.  The resulting cookies are delicious.  If you have ever had my homemade toffee, these are very similar. They are super easy to make and the fam really loved them.  Here is the link to the recipe that I used: http://www.recipegoldmine.com/cookbar/almond-roca-cookie-bars.html

I absolutely love the combination of chocolate and almonds together.  I also love toffee.  This recipe is like a cookie version of the "Almond Roca" candy.  My Mom loved "Almond Roca" candy.  In fact,  I remember her giving it to her customers during the holidays.  When she had her beauty salon in Grosse Pointe, she'd always set up a really nice "treat station" for all of her ladies around Christmastime.  It was always in the front lobby of the salon, and it always had several different varieties of treats and cookies. My sister Amy and I loved to go to Mom's beauty shop, and we especially loved it when "the table" was up!  In addition to the "treat station", my Mom would also give her customers little gifts. It was a little cardboard container (green with the picture of an angel on it), and it would contain little gifts like a nail file, a mini tube of hand lotion, and some candy.  Well "Almond Roca" was usually included in the gift container, or on "the table."  I loved loved loved the big pink container that the candy came in, and I loved the individually gold wrapped candies! YUM!  My Mom loved toffee too, and I cannot eat toffee especially "Almond Roca" and not think of her.

Mom's beauty shop.

My Mom had her own beauty shop my entire childhood...she didn't actually close the shop until after I was married.  Even after she closed the shop, she continued to do hair in her home salon until the end of her life.  I loved going to her beauty shop.  I remember countless times when my sister and I would be off school, or on an odd weekend that we weren't with our Grandparents, we'd get to go to work with Mom. She had the salon for well over 20 years, and I still remember it like I was there yesterday.  I swear I can still hear my Sito Georgia's voice in my head, as she answered the phone...."Carm's Grosse Pointe Beauty Salon...may I help you?"  My Sito Georgia worked at the beauty shop with my Mom for years.  She was the receptionist, "hair sweeper upper", coffee maker,  assistant to the hair stylists, and she was also the "shampoo girl."   Additionally, she did the salon's laundry.  I used to love to go with her to the laundromat that was just a few shops down, and wash the towels and capes.  If the shop wasn't too busy and we were in the middle of doing the laundry, she'd take me to "The White Tower."  "The White Tower", was a little diner that was just next door to the laundromat.  I used to love to sit at the counter and eat a burger and fries while we waited for the laundry.  If I was especially lucky, we might even go to "Kresge" or "Saunders" which were also just down the street.  My Mom's first salon was just a block or so from the "Saunders" on Jefferson, and I remember going there with my Grandparents sometimes when they'd watch us.  Eventually she moved her salon to its final location a few blocks down the street.  All of my Grandparents lived literally within walking distance of both of my Mom's salons, and they lived only a street over from one another.  I would give almost anything to go back to those days...I never realized at the time how lucky I was to have all of "my people" within walking distance.

Mom at work.

My paternal Grandparents lived on Manistique, and my Aunt Pat and Uncle John, and my Uncle Butch and his first wife Mel, shared a flat across the street.  Then, if you went one block over, my maternal Grandparents, my Uncle Larry, my Sito Vicky, and my Aunt Martha all lived on Ashland.  AND all of these family members lived within walking distance of my Mom's beauty shop.  It was awesome.  Speaking of awesome...how awesome is it that I can still remember the phone number to my Mom's salon? 1-313-822-5005.  I cannot even tell you how many times I dialed that number on a rotary phone, only to hear my sweet Carmie or Sito answer the phone. The shop is gone now...literally gone.  They tore the building down.  I don't go to that area much anymore, but we had my Mom's 40 day mass at St. Ambrose (where my parents went to high school and where I attended kindergarten) and we did a drive by.  The shop is gone, and my Grandparents' houses were shabby and dilapidated.  I quickly wiped those images from my mind, as the images from my childhood are still alive and well.  As long as I live I will cherish those memories, and remember those days as some of the happiest of my life. 

In addition to the wonderful memories that I have from those days, that area in Detroit will also always live in my memory as the scene of my first crime.  Yes I committed a crime.  I shoplifted a packet of grape "Kool Aid" when I was 4.  I was at "Mission Valley" the neighborhood grocery store with my Sito Georgia, (that was just down the street from my Mom's beauty shop) doing some shopping.  I asked her to buy me "Kool Aid" and for some reason she said no.  I don't remember my Sito telling me no very often so this was sort of odd.  Well I decided that I wanted it anyway, so I stuck it under my shirt...my white shirt.  How I got past Sito and the clerk, with a purple packet of "Kool Aid" under a white shirt I'll never know.  So as we were walking home, I showed her the "Kool Aid" packet.  She turned right around and made me take it back in to the cashier and apologize!  I was mortified!  Serves me right, and kudos to Sito.  I am 40 and to this day I have never committed another crime...well not any that I'll admit to.  Ha ha☺

Due to my Mom being a hair dresser, I had a live in hair stylist.  I never had my hair cut or styled by anyone other than her. When I was in high school I had some pretty wild hair styles.  I had spiked hair, then I had a faux hawk,  then I dyed my bangs blond and gave them purple tips (see picture on the left.)  I think my favorite hair style though was "the Sheena Easton."  I saw a video for Prince's song "You Got The Look", and in it Sheena Easton had a hair style that I just had to have.  So I taped the video and showed it to my Mom, and she cut my hair just like the video!  (See photo at the end of the blog).  I was working as a nurse aide in the hospital at the time, and one of my patients (an old woman) said to me "...what did your Mom say about your hair when you came home...was she mad honey?"  To which I replied "...no she wasn't mad...she cut it for me." ☺  My Mom didn't only style my hair she did my friends' hair too.  She helped them cut and color their hair...even into styles that she didn't like.  I had a few friends that were "punkers" and I cannot tell you how many crazy hair cuts my Mom gave them. I still think it's pretty cool that I was allowed to have such an alternative look. If you haven't ever seen the Prince video I referenced above, here is a link...check it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ozO6soYJ_I

Since my Mom was my one and only hair stylist, I didn't know what to do about my hair after she passed away. I couldn't bear the thought of going to someone else's salon, so I waited as long as possible.  In fact I actually had Dan cut it for me so I wouldn't have to go to another stylist.  He's actually pretty good at it too.  Dan now cuts Ryan's hair, and remarkably he cuts his own hair as well.  If he could just master women's haircuts Victoria and I would be all set. ☺  I finally relented in February and went to the salon in town.  It was so nostalgic to be in a hair salon again...the smells of perm solution and hair spray really took me back.  As my hair stylist washed my hair, I was instantly transported back to my Mom's beauty shop.  I remember my Mom or my Sito washing my hair, while I stared at the tin ceiling tiles and their ornate designs.  If it was my Sito, when she was finished shampooing my hair, she'd always...always...kiss my forehead.  As I recalled those details I actually started to cry.  I was so glad that my hair stylist didn't notice.  She wiped the tears that ran down my cheek with a towel, and remarked that she had splashed me. I have only been back once since that first time, and I am happy to report it was a little easier. I am sure that every time will be a little better and hopefully...eventually... I'll just get used to it. That's kind of how I conceptualize living my life without my Mom....hopefully someday I 'll just get used to it. That sentiment reminds me of dialogue from the movie "Rabbit Hole."  It's about a couple after the death of their son. In the movie  "Becca" played by Nicole Kidman, is talking with her mom "Nat" played by Diane Wiest who also lost her son (Becca's brother).  Their exchange was as follows: 

"Becca: Does it ever go away? 
Nat: No, I don't think it does. Not for me it hasn't - it has gone on for eleven years. But it changes though. 
Becca: How? 
Nat: I don't know... the weight of it, I guess. At some point, it becomes bearable. It turns into something that you can crawl out from under and... carry around like a brick in your pocket. And you... you even forget it, for a while. But then you reach in for whatever reason and there it is. Oh right... that. Which could be awful - but not all the time. It's kinda... [deep breath]  not that you like it exactly, but it's what you've got instead of your son. So, you carry it around. And uh... it doesn't go away. Which is... 
Becca: Which is what? 
Nat: Fine, actually"

I can totally relate to that exchange.  I've had that proverbial brick in my pocket for 22 months, and I suppose it'll always be there.  To be very honest I am okay with that.  In a sense, I need to miss her...she deserves to have me miss her. She deserved a lot of things. So on the days when that proverbial brick gets too heavy to carry in my pocket, I'll take it out, hold it in my hands, and grieve for my Mom. On the days when the brick seems a little lighter, I'll put it back in my pocket and just carry it with me. I'll just carry her...I'll carry her in my pocket...and always...always... in my heart.♥

1988~ Dan and me...rocking "the Sheena Easton"